A new survey from the National Institute on Drug Abuse shows a significant decline in the use of cigarettes, alcohol, steroids, cocaine, heroin, LSD and methamphetamine. The only bad news in the five-year trend is an increase in the use of cough and cold medicines to get high.

Lloyd Johnston, lead researcher from the University of Michigan, said the drug-use increase of the 1990s is on the decline.

“In some sense the epidemic itself carried the seeds of its own destruction,” he explained, “because it started to call attention to the hazards of drugs.”

That increased attention has resulted in 840,000 fewer kids doing drugs. John Walters, a spokesman for the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy, said several factors played a part.

“Congratulations are in order,” he told Family News in Focus, “to a lot of people who have worked very hard, quietly in their homes, in faith communities and schools and community organizations to help kids get on track in greater numbers.”

Walters also lauded President Bush for paying attention to the growing problem and encouraging others to as well.

“The president, both as a parent and as a governor, knew a lot about this and made it his priority to use what we know more aggressively,” he noted. “This survey shows that he was right and the country is going in a better direction because we’re using that knowledge.”

Jim Copple, executive director of the International Institute for Alcohol Awareness, said it proves moms and dads really are the anti-drug.

“Parents, if they’re consistent and persistent in their messaging,” he said, “can counter that influence and have a significant role.”

This was the first year the survey asked students about the abuse of cough and cold medicines. As a precaution, parents should take inventory of their medicine cabinet and get rid of anything they aren’t taking anymore.

Drug abuse is so widespread in our culture that you cannot expect to isolate your child from exposure to it. You can, however, take specific steps to reduce the likelihood of contact with drugs and build your child’s immunity to using them. These measures should be ongoing, deliberate and proactive.

Model Good Behavior

When it comes to drugs, two adages are worth noting: “Children learn what they live” and “What parents allow in moderation their children will do in excess.” While not absolute truths, these maxims reflect the reality that kids look to their parents for cues as to what is acceptable behavior while at the same time they are developing the discernment required to understand moderation. If you smoke, your offspring will probably do likewise. But it’s never too late to quit, and your decision to give up cigarettes will make an important statement to all the members of your family.

If you consume alcohol at home, what role does it play in your life? Do you need to drink to unwind at the end of the day? Is it a necessary ingredient at every party or family get-together? If so, your children will get the picture that alcohol is a tension reliever and the life of the party, and they will likely use it in a similar fashion.

If you drink modestly — an occasional glass of wine with dinner or a beer every other week — think carefully about alcohol’s role in your family. Many parents decide to abstain while rearing their children in order to send an unambiguous message to steer clear of it. Others feel that modeling modest, non-intoxicated use of alcohol equips children and teenagers to make sensible decisions later in life. Each family must weigh the options carefully and set its own standards.

What about the medicine cabinet? If you are stressed, upset or uncomfortable, are drugs the way you spell relief? Have you accumulated prescription narcotics and tranquilizers that you use freely when the going gets tough? Kids aren’t blind. If they see the adults around them frequently taking “legitimate” drugs to dull their pain, why won’t they use their own drugs of choice to do the same?

Build Drug-Resistant Attitudes

This is an ongoing project, beginning during the first years of your child’s life. Specifically:

• Create an environment that consistently balances love and limits. Kids who know they are loved unconditionally are less likely to seek “pain relief” through drugs, and those who have learned to live within appropriate boundaries will have better impulse control and self-discipline.
• Instill respect and awe for the God-given gift of a body and mind — even one that isn’t perfect.
• Help your children become students of consequences, not only in connection with drugs but with other behaviors as well. Talk about good and bad choices and the logic behind them. “Just say no” is an appropriate motto for kids to learn, but understanding why it is wrong to use harmful substances will build more solid resistance.
• Build a positive sense of identity with your family. This means not only openly affirming and appreciating each member but putting forth the time and effort for shared experiences that are meaningful and fun. A strong feeling of belonging to a loving family builds accountability and helps prevent loneliness.
• Encourage church-related activities that build a meaningful personal faith. Reliance on God is the cornerstone of drug treatment programs, and it makes no sense to leave the spiritual dimension out of the prevention process. A vibrant faith reinforces the concept that the future is worth protecting, stabilizes the emotions during turbulent years, and provides a healthy response to the aches and pains of life.

Begin Talking Early

Because experimentation with drugs and alcohol commonly begins during the grade-school years, start appropriate countermeasures in very young children. A 5-year-old boy may not be ready for a lecture about the physiology of cocaine addiction, but you should be ready to offer commentary when you and your child see someone smoking or drinking, whether in real life or a movie.

Keep Talking

Make an effort to stay one step ahead of your child’s knowledge of the drug scene. If you hear about an athlete, rock star or celebrity who uses drugs, be certain that everyone in the family understands that no amount of fame or fortune excuses this behavior.

Be aware of current trends in your community and look for local meetings or lectures where abuse problems are being discussed. Find out what’s going on — not only from the experts but from your kids and their friends.

All this assumes that you are available to have these conversations. Be careful, because the time when you may be the busiest with career or other responsibilities may also be the time your adolescents at home most need your input.

Find Trustworthy Adults

Don’t blindly assume that the presence of a grown-up guarantees a safe environment. Get to know the parents of your kids’ friends. Make certain your child knows you will pick him up anytime, anywhere — no questions asked — if he finds himself in a situation where drugs or alcohol are being used. And be sure to praise him for a wise decision if he does so.

Courage to Confront

The epidemic of drug abuse spreads from person to person. Whether a recent acquaintance or a long-term friend, if one (or more) of your teenager’s friends is known to be actively using alcohol and/or drugs, you must put restrictions on the relationship.

Even with these limits in place, you will need to keep track of who is influencing whom. If your family is reaching out to a troubled adolescent and helping to move him toward healthier decisions, keep up the good work. But if there is any sign that the drug-using friend is pulling your teenager toward his lifestyle, declare quarantine immediately.

Create Consequences

Teenagers may not be scared off by facts, figures and gory details. Even the most ominous warnings may not override an adolescent’s belief in his or her own immortality, especially when other compelling emotions — such as the need for peer acceptance — are operating at full throttle.

You may improve the odds by making it clear that you consider the use of cigarettes, alcohol or illegal drugs a very serious matter. If your adolescent confesses that he tried a cigarette or a beer at a party and expresses an appropriate resolve to avoid a repeat performance, a heart-to-heart conversation would be more appropriate than grounding him for six months.

But if your warnings repeatedly go unheeded, you will need to establish and enforce some meaningful consequences. Loss of driving, dating or even phone privileges for an extended period of time may be in order.

Pre-Existing Problems

Even in families that hold strong values and practice ongoing drug-proofing, there are no guarantees that substance abuse won’t affect one or more of your children. As you begin to cope with the chemical intruder(s) in your home, keep the following principles in mind:

• Don’t deny or ignore the problem. If you do, it is likely to continue to worsen until your family life is turned inside out.
• Don’t wallow in false guilt. Most parents assume a great deal of self-blame when a drug problem erupts in their home. If you do carry some responsibility for what has happened, face up to it, confess it to God and your family, and then get on with the task of helping your child.

This column was excerpted from Complete Book of Baby and Child Care, published by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Copyright © 1999 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved.

Do you know an alcoholic? Studies show that nearly everyone in the United States has a friend or family member who struggles with alcohol addiction. About 10 percent of Americans are alcoholics and each of those 20 million people directly affects the lives of at least six others. So how can you help the person you love who is struggling with alcoholism?

• Be informed. Perhaps it is the medical problems that excessive drinking causes or the social difficulties most alcoholics experience that will lead your loved one to give up drinking. The more information you have available about the dangers of excessive alcohol use, the more prepared you will be to help a loved one give up the bad habit.
• Get support. Dealing with the difficulties of an alcoholic family member can be overwhelming and devastating, so don’t try to go it alone. Look for support networks or substance abuse counseling in your area; use the informational list below to locate a place where you can get help. Getting and keeping yourself strong will help you to be stop enabling and start supporting your alcoholic loved one.

Then based on what you’re learning in your support group or counseling:

• Talk with your alcoholic loved one. Tell him your feelings, concerns and fears. The more candid you can be about your own struggles, the more likely he is to respond by sharing his fear of giving up drinking. Beware though — most alcoholics employ denial techniques that build walls between them and their loved ones. Don’t let the walls scare you away; keep breaking them down, brick by brick, with caring words instead of angry accusations.
• Help your alcoholic loved one find a self-help organization. Fighting the disease of alcoholism is something few, if any, can do on their own. Meeting with others who are struggling with the same problems will help your loved one feel supported and accepted as he begins his recovery. (Following this list, we’ve suggested some places to go for help.)
• Provide support. More than half of all recovering alcoholics succeed if they have a support network of family and friends. And most of those who beat the alcohol addiction for at least a year can remain sober for the rest of their lives. But without a support network, nearly all alcoholics end up drinking again.
• Do an intervention. If nothing else works, it may be time to intervene. Gather friends and family members who would positively impact your loved one.

Teen drug addiction is always some other family’s tragedy, until it hits home.

It was June. Fresh faces sprouted throughout our community newspaper. High school graduates who excelled in academics, sports and community service were honored daily with photos and short articles recognizing their accomplishments. I read the accounts with joy — and a heavy heart. How wonderful to see hope sprinkled among the daily tragedies. Yet I grieved as the ideal portrait I’d painted of my own teen faded into reality.

“Bright, beautiful, full of energy. Can be a delightful teen.” I paused a moment to ponder. “Could have made it, but she stumbled and fell short of the finish line.” It began as a little rebellion. A desire to be hip.

She smoked her first cigarette behind the church. Drank her first beer in junior high. I thought, She must be someone else’s daughter. It couldn’t happen on my manicured cul-de-sac, in our church. But, it did.

Our suspicions had been confirmed an early spring afternoon the year before. It was one of those unseasonably warm days I usually rejoiced in. Rain and sunshine mingled in the air when I answered the door to find the mother of my daughter’s best friend. Worry covered her face, and her rapid words tumbled over themselves. “The girls skipped school again — I think they’re high — my daughter refused a drug test.”

We turned to my sullen girl. Standing by the kitchen sink, she casually downed another glass of water, hoping to dilute the results of any analysis. Sarcastically she denied all allegations. “Let’s go, test me right now!” she demanded, apparently feeling safe in dishonest compliance.

For months we had been checking off a mental list: a rebellious attitude, dropping grades, unexcused absences, secretive phone calls, new friends replaced the church pals she grew up with. Sometimes we imagined the worst. Yet the excuses were convincing, and we hoped for the best. According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, 80 percent of high school seniors have used alcohol, and 5.1 million Americans between the ages of 12 and 20 are binge or heavy drinkers. Why did we think it would never happen to us?

Once confronted, the girls ran. But after 10 days in California, our daughter returned, and a drug/alcohol assessment revealed the beginning stages of an addiction. Our plans, our hopes, were put on hold. We had a war to fight. I feared for my daughter’s life. An addiction to drugs and alcohol could keep her in bondage for years, should she survive her teens.

After the disbelief and “why me’s” subsided, I realized I had to choose faith or fear.

Then, with God’s help, we confronted the problem:

• Truth. Denial is just as strong as the street drugs we fight. Truth didn’t allow the “kids will be kids” mantra to lull us into complacency. Research indicates that addiction can occur quickly in those predisposed by heredity. Also, according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, people who begin drinking before age 15 are four times more likely to become alcoholics than those who begin at 21.
• Love. During confrontation God directed our response. “We love you, we care about you, but we will not tolerate this behavior.” We were comforted knowing God loved our child more than we could and that whatever the outcome He would be with us.
• Prayer. I knelt beside my sleeping girl’s bed and petitioned God for her safety and deliverance. Some days, however, I ran out of prayers and despair hovered overhead. I called the youth pastor, our church prayer chain and asked friends and family to pray for us.
• Support. Teachers, counselors, our family doctor, the police department, courts and Alcoholics Anonymous offered support. We asked questions, listened and prayed for discernment.
• Consequences. Washington state offers a Youth at Risk petition allowing parents to ask a court to intervene. Soon a judge told our defiant teen that she would go either into treatment or jail. With God’s help, we let her suffer the consequences of her choices. She spent some time in jail. A court order separated her from a friendship that encouraged her rebellion. Driving was a privilege limited to treatment, school and work. We prayed she would continue to get caught if she chose to do anything illegal. We wanted her to experience enough pain to discourage her destructive behavior.

Her difficult recovery began. She exchanged high school for rehab, football games and dances for AA meetings. She’ll never get back her senior year, and I grieve with her; but now she’s working, enrolled in college and committed to staying sober.

I folded up the newspaper and glanced outside. I reflected on the day my daughter asked God for the strength and courage to join the fight. Misty daffodils have yielded to rosebuds, and the beauty of rebirth nourishes my soul. Despite lingering disappointment and pain, a new portrait emerged. Same tousled honey hair and mischievous smile, but now her blue eyes glisten with hope.

Stage One: Experimentation

• Use is occasional, sporadic, often unplanned — weekends, summer nights, someone’s unsupervised party.
• Use is precipitated by peer pressure, curiosity, thrill seeking, desire to look and feel grown-up.
• Gateway drugs are usually used — cigarettes, alcohol, marijuana, possibly inhalant abuse.
• A drug high is easier to experience because tolerance has not been developed.

Parents may notice:

• Tobacco or alcohol on the breath or intoxicated behavior.
• Little change in normal behavior between episodes of drug use.

Stage Two: Regular Drug and/or Alcohol Use

• Alcohol and other drugs are used not only on weekends but also on weekdays, not only with friends but when alone.
• Quantities of alcohol and drugs increase as tolerance develops; hangovers become more common.
• Blackouts may occur — periods of time in which drugs or alcohol prevent normal memories from forming “What happened last night?” becomes a frequent question.
• More time and attention are focused on when the next experience will occur.
• Fellow drinkers/drug users become preferred companions.

Parents may notice:

• Son or daughter will be out of the house later at night, overnight, or all weekend.
• School performance worsens-unexplained school absences.
• Outside activities such as sports are dropped.
• Decreased contact with friends who don’t use drugs.
• Disappearance of money or other valuables.
• Child withdraws from the family, is increasingly sullen and hostile.
• User is caught in one or many lies.

Stage Three: In the Mire of Addiction

• Alcohol and drugs become primary focus of attention.
• Becoming high is a daily event.
• There is a use of harder, more dangerous drugs.
• More money is spent each week on drugs: theft or dealing may become part of drug-seeking behavior.
• Adolescent displays increasing social isolation; no contact with non-drug-using friends; more drug use in isolation rather than socially.

Parents may notice the behaviors listed above, plus:

• Escalation of conflicts at home.
• Loss of nearly all control of the adolescent.
• Possible discovery of a stash of drugs at home.
• Arrest(s) for possession of and/or dealing drugs or for driving while intoxicated.

Stage Four: Drowning in Addiction

• Constant state of intoxication; being high is routine, even at school or job (if there is any attendance at all.
• Blackouts increase in frequency.
• Physical appearance deteriorates — weight loss, infections, poor self-care. Injectable drugs are possibly used.
• Involvement in casual sexual relationships (at times in exchange for drugs). User will likely be involved with theft, dealing, and other criminal activity.
• Guilt, self-hatred, and thoughts of suicide increase.
• Adolescent abandons any apparent interest in spiritual matters.

Parents are likely to be dealing with:

• Complete loss of control of adolescent’s behavior, escalation of conflict, possibly to the point of violence.
• Ongoing denial by user that drugs are a problem.
• Increasing problems with the law and time spent with police, attorneys, hearings, court officials, etc.
• Other siblings negatively affected because the family is preoccupied or overwhelmed by consequences of drug user’s behavior.